“Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder tooday. Mawage, that bwessed awangment, that dweam wifin a dweam…”
Marriage is wonderful.
I realize the above sentiment isn’t felt by everyone who finds themselves in the covenant relationship. But I do believe that that was God’s intention when He created the first type of human companionship. 
In order for marriage to be a “dweam wifin a dweam”, it requires both people to operate as God set it up.
And for the husbands, this is our directive:
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave up Himself for her.” – Ephesians 5:25
While, as I mentioned, I do believe both spouses have a responsibility in the marriage, I’m convinced marriage would be more wonderful if us husbands would get our acts together.
Guys — let’s get over ourselves, humble ourselves and love our wives as Jesus loved the church!
How can we do that?
  • We can serve her.

    You can’t look at the life of Jesus and not see a servant. In fact, Jesus made it very clear that He came to serve and not be served (Mark 10:45).

    Our wives do not exist to be our slaves. She does not exist to do our bidding. 

    Yes, God does refer to Eve as Adam’s help mate, but that does not equal slave. 

    Our wives are precious and should be treated as such. Jesus clearly demonstrates this understanding. You can’t read Scripture and not see Jesus’ heart for His bride. 

    How do you serve your wife? Do you look for opportunities to bless her? Do you take time to love her as she feels loved? Do you listen to her? Do you help her?

  • We can honor her.

    What Jesus has done for us, His church, is amazing. Part of that is He has seated us in heavenly places with Him (Ephesians 2:4-7).

    We no longer have the back seat on the bus. We’ve been moved to the front.

    When we’re with just the guys, or when she’s not around, do we belittle her for a laugh? When we’re with her in a crowd, is she the butt of our jokes?

    Has it ever gone as far as calling her derogatory names? Can you imagine Jesus calling the church that word?

    We should honor our wives. We should encourage them with our words and actions. We should make sure everyone knows that we married up and that the lady we’re hitched to is amazing.

  • We can sacrifice for her.

    Husbands, our wives have desires, wants and needs. And sometimes those things require that we lay down our own in order that her’s might be fulfilled.

    Jesus so clearly did this with the cross. 

    We humans had the greatest need. Our sin separated us from God. And we couldn’t save ourselves.

    Yet Jesus came, took OUR place. Took OUR shame. Paid the price that WE owed. And He did it FREELY.

    How are you sacrificing for your wife? Do you do things for her just to get a return? If so, that’s not sacrifice, that’s manipulation.

    How are you laying down your own life for your wife without expecting recompense?

    Sacrificing for our wives will require we lay down our own wants, our own desires to see that her’s are met. It may require we give up sleep, or give up watching a game, or give up time with the guys. It may require we let her spend some extra money on herself.

    However it looks, we are to sacrifice for her.

What a responsibility we husbands have!
Obviously, we can not perfectly love as Jesus has, however, we’re not given room for excuses. Don’t let the excuse that you’re not perfect hold you back from obeying Jesus by loving your wife.

Let’s determine in our hearts to love our wives as Jesus has loved us, the church. And then, by grace, live out that directive.